As Debra Whitman approached her 50th birthday, she found herself contemplating the same questions many of us do: How long will I live? Will I lose my memory? Will I have enough money? How will I die? Searching for guidance, Whitman, now 54, AARP’s executive vice president and chief public policy officer, and former staff director for the US Senate Special Committee on Aging, discovered a gap in literature. There was no "What to Expect When You’re Expecting" for adults looking to navigate the second half of life with grace. With the US population aged 100 and over expected to quadruple in the next 30 years, according to the Pew Research Center, Whitman took it upon herself to write that book, "The Second Fifty: Answers to the 7 Big Questions of Midlife and Beyond."

Happiness and Aging

Whitman reveals that personal happiness tends to increase with age. An AARP survey found that we are least happy in our 40s and 50s, with happiness peaking in our 70s. By this age, 91% of individuals report being happy, and even those over 50 are optimistic about the future, with 90% viewing it positively. Despite health concerns, most consider themselves healthy into their 80s and 90s.

Combating Cognitive Decline

The biggest fear about aging is cognitive decline and dementia. Contrary to popular belief, only about 15% of people, even in their late 70s, have mild cognitive impairment. Whitman suggests five healthy habits to prevent or delay dementia: regular exercise, a healthy diet, maintaining a healthy weight, no smoking, and moderate alcohol consumption. These habits not only extend life expectancy but also support brain health, potentially reducing the risk of dementia by up to one third.

Learning from Other Cultures

Whitman highlights how other countries approach aging and death. Singapore, for example, offers lifelong learning and Silver Academies to keep older adults engaged and mentally sharp, along with job-training programs for the middle-aged and younger. In New Zealand, the Kiwi Coffin Club combines social activities with end-of-life conversations, allowing members to decorate coffins in a meaningful way, even donating them to low-income families.

The Importance of Community

Community is critical in the aging process. Social isolation can shorten life expectancy by 15 years, equivalent to smoking 15 cigarettes a day. Strong relationships, friendships, family, and community ties are the hallmarks of healthy aging, according to the Harvard Study of Adult Development.

Mindset and Healthy Aging

Whitman emphasizes that mindset matters. Those who view aging positively live longer, have fewer strokes and heart attacks, and lower chances of dementia. A positive view on aging can extend life by seven and a half years.

Rethinking Advance Directives

Contrary to common advice, Whitman discovered that advance directives may not always be followed and can be harmful. Instead, she recommends having conversations with trusted individuals who can make decisions based on your best interests if you become incapacitated.

Aging with Gratitude and Connection

Since writing her book, Whitman has focused on building relationships and carrying a sense of gratitude, recognizing the importance of these values in living a long and healthy life.

Writer Terry Ward, now in her late 40s, finds herself happier than she was in her 30s, embracing the wisdom and community that come with aging.